Vick repents

Michael Vick recently accepted an invitation from PETA and attended an eight-hour course on animal cruelty at the group's Virginia headquarters. PETA assistant director Dan Shannon said when Vick completed the course, he was given material to take home and study. Vick returned to the offices on a later day to take a test on the things he'd learned, which he passed.

Apparently Vick's day was specifically planned for him, and it focused on animal protection and empathy. First, he was given an overview of animal protection, then a session that laid out the scientific evidence for animals' ability to feel happiness, sadness and pain. He saw police training tapes that describe links between violence toward animals and violence toward humans. Another session was based on Christian teachings about the treatment of animals.

"He seemed to get the most out of that," Shannon said. "He was blown away by how much the Bible had to say about animals."

Though PETA officials are still pressing for jail time for Vick, Shannon did say everyone was impressed with the seriousness with which Vick approached his classes. "He seemed nervous at first," Shannon said, "but he seemed really interested."

Because of the impact PETA officials think the course had on Vick, Shannon sent a letter on Tuesday to NFL commissioner Roger Goodell asking him to make a similar course mandatory for all NFL players.

I’m sure sensitivity training will go over real well in NFL clubhouses. And while they’re at it they can send in some feminists to explain to the players that it’s NOT okay to spit on women. Or to shoot your girlfriend because you got her preggers.