Peavy can't park

Jake Peavy's disorderly conduct charge was dismissed after the San Diego Padres pitcher apologized for a confrontation with a security officer when he double parked to unload baseball gear at Mobile Regional Airport. Peavy was arrested in his hometown after he parked in front of the airport entrance Jan. 4. The 25-year-old player was taking equipment on a church mission to help children in the Dominican Republic.

Double parking to unload gear for a church mission doesn't seem like that bad of a crime. Unless he belongs to the "Church of Blow" and that gear of his was actually a pack of miniature donkeys that his buddy Juan Valdez was going to use to sneak their crops off the plantation.